the book battle

September 8, 2015

 

Calvin & Hobbes

I’m in this huge battle to give up books. This became really clear in the Seattle move when the movers told me I was moving 5 thousand pounds and 2 thousand of them were books.

 

I’ve been trying to give up books ever since.

 

In varying degrees, I am winning. I’m down like 1,500 pounds of books since then, and with every new move, it goes down a little more. And I move a LOT. Now it’s down to at least 500 pounds or less.

 

I worry about my priorities. I’ll be sorting through a stack of books and hit Calvin & Hobbes and say, Oh fuck you absolutely not, those stay. Or Captain Underpants. He stays, God Dammit!

 

I suspect this doesn’t much say I am an adult.

 

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a few bad apples

January 8, 2015

 

poison_apple

 

In 1988, the Ayatollah Khomeini put a price on author Salmon Rushdie’s head. Rushdie wasn’t wanted “dead or alive.” Khomeini wanted Rushdie dead. I don’t know what the original price tag was for one dead author, but as of 2013, the price on Rushdie’s head was over 3 million pounds.

The Ayatollah is gone. The prices on artists’ heads are not.

 


 

In 2004, Dutch filmmaker Theo van Gogh was shot dead on a busy Amsterdam street. The first bullet took Theo off his bicycle. He tried to make it across the street. Theo’s murderer followed him on foot and shot him again. Then Theo’s murderer slashed Theo’s throat and stuck a letter to his chest with a knife. Theo was 47 years old. His crime was a short fiction film aired on Dutch public television depicting a Muslim woman’s difficulties in an arranged marriage.  

In 2005, Danish cartoonist Kurt Westergaard’s drawing of Muhammad with a bomb in his turban put him on Islam’s hit list. There have been multiple attempts to murder Kurt. He lives in a home rivaling a Brinks security office and under police protection to this day.  

Also in 2005, Danish publication Jyllands-Posten’s former editors Carsten Juste and Flemming Rose made the hit list – for publishing Westergaard’s drawing.  

In 2006, Swedish artist Lars Vilks made Islam’s hit list. He, like Rushdie and Wetergaard, is still alive. He sleeps with an axe by his bed.  

In 2010, South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker received death threats for their depiction of Muhammad in a bear suit in their animated cartoon. They were assured they too were on the road to Theo van Gogh’s fate. A photo of Theo with his throat slit and a knife in his chest was attached just to make things festive. The South Park guys are still breathing. Probably because stations caved and censored a lot of the episode.  

In 2010, in response to the South Park threats, Seattle artist Molly Norris, who worked for a Seattle paper, publicly suggested an “Everybody Draw Muhammad Day.” Molly received so may death threats she quit her job, fled Seattle, and changed her name. As far as I know, she’s still in FBI protective custody.  

In 2011, the Paris offices of satirical French magazine Charlie Hebdo were firebombed, forcing the publication to move after its offices were destroyed. Editor Stephane Charbonnier, you guessed it, was on Islam’s hit list. Had been for a while, fending off litigation and death threats. Charlie Hebdo’s crime? A few satirical and not particularly tasteful cartoons featuring Muhammad.  

Apparently Muhammad seriously does not have a sense of humor because In 2015, armed men stormed Charlie Hebdo’s new Paris offices with automatic weapons and shot Stephane Charbonnier and 11 other people dead.

 


 

There is now an Al Queada Most Wanted poster being passed around the internet showing Charbonnier’s face struck out in red.

 


Think about that. These murderers, these serial murderers, don’t just keep little photos of their victims to themselves they can cross your face off of. They put your photo on the fucking internet. With a big red X through it.

THAT is fucking blaspheme.

 


 

The above is the short list. There are more.

And that’s a long time span.

17 years. For 17 years, artists, filmmakers, satirists, journalists, comics, authors, editors, gallery owners have been threatened, attacked, murdered in the name of defending the honor of a man who heard voices in a cave and has been dead for 1500 years. In Switzerland. Sweden. The US. France. Denmark. All over the fucking globe, artists are targeted, intimidated, threatened, and murdered.

 


 

A few bad apples, I am told. Most of Islam is not like that, I am told. Most Muslims are just nice people trying to go about their daily lives, I am told.

 


 

You know what a few bad apples are? The Unibomber. He was a bad apple, with a couple buddy bad apples.

This is a fucking orchard.

 


 

It’s time to burn that orchard down.

 


The Silencing of Theo van Gogh
FBI Warns Seattle Cartoonist About Threats
Salman Rushdie bounty increased amid anti-Islam film controversy
Al-Qaida’s ‘dead artist club’
Charlie Hebdo editor Stephane Charbonnier crossed off chilling al-Qaeda hitlist
Swedish Police Hide Threatened Cartoonist
Seattle Cartoonist in Hiding After Death Threats
The Danish Cartoonist Who Survived An Axe Attack
Jihad Against Danish Newspaper
South Park censored after threat of fatwa over Muhammad episode
France manhunt: Police raid homes, arrest several suspects after Charlie Hebdo massacre
Paris Killers Got Wrong Door Before ‘Decapitating’ Magazine
Satirical Magazine Is Firebombed in Paris

 

 

cat_oatmeal

 


 


–>where i got that hilarious goodness:
–>the oatmeal
–>see more now

 

 

 

 

 

where that cartoon comes from :
that is from should you be laughing at this by hugleikur dagsson

[i was so needing a dagsson fix]

this cracked me up

March 31, 2014

 

batman_superman_rock_paper

 

 

Apparently I have upset a bunch of “nice guys” by re-posting the David Wong essay and now they are gathered on another board dedicated to “no hate talk” calling me ignorant and stupid, among other things. Fun!

As long as people are all riled up though, here is Louis CK’s observations on women dating. [Louis CK is way more fun than a bunch of self proclaimed “nice guys” I don’t know calling me an ignorant slut.]

 

 

Cartoons!

December 30, 2012

Aren’t you glad there are Do’s & Don’ts for surgeons?

com_operating_room_4

And for the Bomb Squad?

com_bom_sqd_3

And for pilots?

com_pilot_3

Don’t you wish there were some for screenwriters?

com_studio_4

Now there are.

com_cover_1

CLICK HERE TO —>> BUY THE BOOK

the art of war

August 23, 2012

 

 

I’m having this conversation with some friends. They are making a movie.

My friends are also creating a comic book for the movie — or in more polite terms, a graphic novel — as a pre-launch ad campaign.

It’s a smart idea. Get it out there, get it circulating, get people knowing and talking and seeing and thinking about it. My friends figure they will break even on the comic too so it is free advertising hitting comic cons.

But they’re talking about this other guy. This guy who was pre-vamping for a film and made a comic book and never put the comic book on the market. He just printed up copies and gave them to studio suits and industry people, and never ever sold the comic. Sort of a fancier cooler kind of story board, that. And a collector’s item since there were only a very few in existence and you could only get them as a gift, they were not for sale. And my friends are saying this journalist one time hit him with this question, “You created the comic, you had it all graphed out and whatnot, printer friendly, ready for market” why didn’t you ever sell it?

And the filmmaker didn’t answer the question.

So we are sitting there. My friends are puzzling over why. And so am I. And then I know —

If he had put the comic book on the market, while he was selling the film? Industry people would have wanted to know the sales numbers and would have walked away if those weren’t high enough. So he made that book a gift, a special thing, that only some people could get, that wasn’t even available for sale. And he never had to answer the question “Is this a best seller?” in a meeting.

Smart guy.

 


 

where the art work comes from:
that is chess by nestor galina

 

 

where that comic comes from :
that is from jim c. hines

 

 


*via :::the high definite:::

 

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