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shiny!

April 30, 2010

 

This is very cool my friend Kitty grabbed my section of the College of Fine Arts awards ceremony so I could post it here. Yay!

[Thank you Kitty.]

 



*you can download the full ceremony from iTunes there are two parts, part i & part ii, i’m in part ii

:::podcast link:::

 

 

gone to get prizes

March 27, 2010

 

I am off to —

Utah to visit my university.

They are giving me an :::award::: Yay!

Back in April.

Don’t burn the house down while I am gone.

 

where the art work comes from :
that is from blizzard84

ow ow ow

August 16, 2007

 

interruptionSo yesterday —

I allowed myeslf to be plied with saki [not that kind of plied, pervos, jeez] so am mildly hungover. Also I started doing a new type of arm sets [ow ow ow]. And basically am in no condition to be clever or type [ow ow ow] so we interrupt this regularly scheduled blog entry to bring you a fun blog entry from the past —

Why I Like William Shatner.

It is fun. Go read it.

 

where the art work comes from :
that is interruption by cinema cowgirl

celluloid & crimson

June 26, 2007

 

girl on topI look at all these photos —

Of a girl with crimson hair —

I miss that.

I lost the crimson hair when I came to Hollywood.

I was working so hard at being cute little non threatening writer girl.

It worked.

I was so non threatening some guy patted me on the head and said “You must write romantic comedy.”


I want to give him rabies.

Still.

 

where the art work comes from :
that is girl on top by MaleficusV

boundaries

May 29, 2007

 

two mules

I am on the phone —

With a journalist.

He is having a minor psychotic break. Maybe a major psychotic break. He has forgotten how to write.

This happens. I know a guy who has written seventeen published novels but every time he starts a new one he does not remember how to write a book.

This is different.

I am, at the time, on deadline, with forty-eight hours till turn in. So it is maybe not convenient to spend hours [and it is hours] talking someone off a ledge. But, I do.

The reporter is doing a story on a school. One of those new age very artsy schools that are private and expensive and somewhat outside normal curiculum except for meeting state imposed curiculum guidelines [maybe] which have gotten to be pretty loose. A kid died at the school. He is investigating the school. Looking for something wrong. His assignment is roast the school. He is looking for something bad. And cannot find it.

We talk.

And the info drops adult instructors are dancing naked with teen students around a campfire and also having sex with students.

I say, Well that is maybe your angle.

He says, Huh?

I say, It is inappropriate for adult teaching faculty to dance naked with teenage students and have sex with them.

He says, “It is?”

I know two things at this moment: One, I will never date this man; two, something is seriously wrong with the environment he grew up in.

 

where the art work comes from :
that is a shot by theresa manzanares

In college, I could not sneak out for a smoke or sleep through the anthropology classes. Betil was a forensic anthropologist and a respected primatologist and very very smart and very very strict. You showed up, you turned off the recorders, and you shut up, listened and learned.

Well mostly.

use the radioactive ooze!

Okay that is not my test. Also I am not admitting the “you are hot do you work out?” notes on math tests that terrorized that newlywed math teacher into giving me A’s instead of reading and grading my exams.

where i lifted this turtle :
“like all things spanish, it is dangerous”
at missed manners

more fun with tests :
they totally studied

auf deutsch!

February 15, 2007

Jennifer said the sweetest thing about that photo in This One is for Janie :

“Wait, she’s that girl in college where all the boys, ALL THE BOYS followed her every move, took French to be next to her and then kept her on the dance floor all night. Or was it a movie???”

max on campusJennifer is really sweet. And really wrong.

See. Technically, I did not look like that on campus. I looked like this on campus.

[What, you thought film students wore make up?]

And technically, it was not French. It was German. And, things went a little different.

I showed up for first day of class. Everyone else showed up for first day of class. And then —

Frau Miller showed up for first day of class.

Frau Miller was East German. The real deal. Like, she lived behind the wall when there was a wall. She was older, but you could tell she had been built like Jane Mansfield. Bombshell material. Also the real deal. And she walked into that classroom, up to the front of the room, and rattled off some German at the class –

And the whole class answered back.

In German.

I am not kidding.

The whole class —

Except for me.

I did not know what in hell she just said. Let alone how to answer.

Frau Miller smiled. “You see? You can understand German just through context.”

And I stared wide eyed around that room and realized, Frau Miller believed that. That people could understand German just through context, and somehow muster up a response in German, a [hello!] foreign language, just, you know, going on context [wtf!], and she believed this because she had been teaching a long time, and every time, got a room full of ringers..

[Ringers are people who already know something or are partially proficient at a subject and just take the class for an easy coast for the gpa and credits.]

I was not a ringer. I was someone who did not know German. I was not the only person who got this right off either. I was sitting next to a cute guy starting out. Who I am pretty sure sat by me because he thought I was cute. I was sitting by a lot of people, when that class started. I was in the middle of the classroom surrounded by desks with people in them.

Frau Miller talked some more, auf Deutsch, natch, because we would all know what she was saying because of “context.” And everyone answered, auf Deutsch, because clearly they did know. Through [coughcoughringerscoughcough] “context.” [I am not kidding about ringers either five girls in that class were German, yes, German, as in from Germany, transfer students, grew up in Germany speaking, hello, German.] And then she said we would take a break and after the break we would partner up with people sitting next to us.

We all went on break.

We all came back.

And every single person who had been sitting next to me going in was now sitting at least one desk, sometimes two or three, away from me.

Frau Miller gave me a weird look.

I do not think she got why I was sitting in a circle of empty desks in the middle of the room.

Dear Frau Miller, it was not my breath. Really. I had tic tacs.

why i like william shatner

December 16, 2006

 

william shatnerSince you made the trip —

[and it may have been a long trip too there is a string of links behind this new blog] I figure I better post something clever or entertaining here to make it worth your while. Unfortunately it is 3:30 am and I am not clever or entertaining mostly I am wide eyed with hair sticking up in unfortunate ways surrounded by too many caffiene enriched empty diet soda cans. But, lucky you, I have been clever AND entertaining in the past [yeah I tell myself that] so I am pirating one of my favorite essays and posting it here for you:

why i like william shatner
by your favorite adams girl

I had this anthropology professor in college, Betil Kunzler Yetz. ( I hope I am spelling that right because I could not even spell that right when I was in her classes.) Betil was tiny. I towered over her and I am only 5′ 6″ when I stand really tall so she could not have been over 5 feet and was maybe even tinier. In my memory she is always in pearls with her hair coifed in little black curls and she has on perfect red lipstick that never comes off ever. And dresses. Betil always wore dresses and the skirts were always proper just below the knee.

Betil was a physical anthropologist and her specialties were forensic science and primatology. It was funny to me listening to tiny Betil talk about heading to Las Vegas to identify the latest body they pulled out of sand. (Bury a body in Las Vegas sand and in two days you have a skeleton that looks a hundred years old so you need a real scientist to tell you how old this person was and what gender and what was cause of death. People in the “know” know this too because police pull a LOT of unidentifiable bodies out of that Las Vegas sand.) I always wondered what sturdy police and FBI guys thought when they saw this tiny Betil woman get off a plane in pearls and a proper skirt and say “Okay, show me the body.”

Betil also worked with zoos all over and would tell stories about lemurs. Lemurs are my favorite primates. They have masks and prehensile tails. And when lemurs get excited, well, they get real excited all at once — mostly in the air over your head — and after working in lemur cages Betil’s husband would not even let her in a car without hosing her off first and I bet they are super happy someone invented Fabreeze finally which really works. But lemurs are not the only primates. Gorillas are primates too. And Betil told us a Koko story.

Koko is a gorilla who speaks sign language and she had a pet kitten named “Ball.” She has been in news lots and even did a chat on AOL so she is a celebrity gorilla and lots of people have heard of her. One day Koko’s trainers decided to mate Koko. And they contacted all the zoos with male gorillas and the male gorillas got spruced and flew out to meet Koko. And Koko said forget it. To each and every one of them.

Everyone was perplexed because, well, these were the most elligible bachelor gorillas in the world Koko was turning down. And I guess as far as gorillas go, they looked good. To us. Not to Koko. But no one really understands girl gorilla criteria when it comes to bachelor gorillas or who girl gorillas like or why. (A lot of guy scientists in the brush pretend they do and write big papers on it but they do not even understand their own girlfriends let alone girls of another species so don’t believe them for a second they are making it up.)

Unlike other girl gorillas, though, Koko understands English and can sign so they could ask her. So that is what they did. They asked Koko why she was turning away all these gorilla callers who were so elligible and handsome and came all this way to woo her. And Koko told them Koko didn’t like those gorilla boys no matter how elligible they were because Koko was saving herself for her big crush. And they said, Well, who is your big crush, Koko? And Koko said —

“William Shatner.”

Okay. William Shatner was married and also not a gorilla so that was a problem. But Koko liked William Shatner and that was that, it was William Shatner or no one for her so there went the “let’s breed Koko” plan. And it could have ended right there. Could have, but didn’t. Because —

William Shatner heard about it. Heard about how Koko had this big crush on him and would not even talk to boy gorillas because she was crushy on William Shatner.

I do not know what most men’s reaction to a 300 pound gorilla having a crush on them would be. But I know William Shatner’s. He learned sign language. And sign is not easy, either, it is a whole language just on its own. But William Shatner learned it. And met with Koko. Got in a room with a 300 pound girl gorilla who had a crush on him — so he could let her down easy.

I will always love William Shatner for that. For learning sign so he could talk to a girl gorilla to let her down easy.

Love and Kisses,

Your Sometimes Clever AND Entertaining Adams Girl