I am studying the physics dilemma, no matter how many clothes I throw into the closet, every time I open the closet door, there is nothing in there to wear. It is maddening. It must be solved. I’ll get the Nobel Prize when I do. For sport, I climb the Eiffel Tower. And base jump off on rainy days. I am terrified of heights. And peaceful at sea. I work harder than Satan. I sleep later than God. On weekends I repair small toaster ovens for orphans. On holidays, I send Queen Elizabeth cards. I told my dogs they were adopted — and I got them used. They didn’t believe me. They said they had my eyes. When I am bored I teach dust bunnies to box. I give them names. And little outfits. I wrap all recyclables in Christmas paper. I put on pretty bows. I smoke like a chimney. I drink like a fish. I tell lies for a living. And the truth at home. I have pink dancing slippers — that I have never worn. And roller skates with fancy bows. I am good at big things. Like conquering the world. And lousy at little things. Like sitting on hold. I have always relied on the kindness of strangers. I believe in the Golden Rule. I believe in true love. And I believe tomorrow is another day.