but would you want to fuck her?

January 31, 2015

 

author colleen mccullough
 
Is that crude? Yes, yes it is. It is also accurate. I’m tired of being polite instead of accurate. [No worries, you can mention my trash mouth along with my weight in my obituary.]

On January 29th, Colleen McCullough, teacher, scientist, researcher, doctor and beloved author who touched million of lives, died at the age of 77. She was one of Australia’s most prestigious authors, she penned 25 novels and is best known for The Thorn Birds which sold 30 million copies worldwide, earning $1.9 million — a record for the time — and was adapted into a TV miniseries that came in second at the time in viewings only to Roots.

Her obituary in the Australian opens:

Colleen McCullough, Australia’s best selling author, was a charmer. Plain of feature, and certainly overweight, she was nevertheless a woman of wit and warmth.

So there you have it. She was fat and plain. Good to know. Because no matter how accomplished a woman is, you can sum her up by whether or not she’s fat and whether or not she is attractive to men. Good thing she was jolly, or that fat thing might have really counted against her….

 


 
I’m guessing Colleen did not have kids. I don’t know for a fact, maybe she did. But usually they don’t go straight for “fat and not enough make up to make me want to do her” if they can just call you a mom and relegate your important to whether or not a baby ever popped out of your vagina. They do it to astronauts. They do it to photographers. If Colleen had had kids, they probably would have done it to her.
 


 
Check out the hashtag on twitter, #myozobituary – that baby is going viral yay!

 

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