August 25, 2016
I get bored talking about me so let’s talk about something more fun.
Let’s talk about my shoes!
[Not really, my shoes are totally fun.]
Online Master Screenwriting Classes in September.
You know I have to do that right? It is sort of my job.
*Also a beginners screenwriting class with Gotham:
Are you still here? Holding out for the musicians?
You so get the prize.
[I am by the way not telling you why they are my favorites. Don’t be nosy. Jeez.]
You’re welcome, Internetz.
Your Shoe Crazy
August 23, 2016
I have been neglecting you.
My sorry. There is a lot going on. Classes. Workshops. Students. Universities. Competitions. Being a judge. And whatnot. A lot. For me personally though? The body is the real thing right now.
Remember when I got hurt back in December 2014? I jumped from a size 4 to a size 8 after that accident. You can’t work out with a head injury. Not to mention a couple cracked ribs and a sprained shoulder and such. I was seriously injured. It took 3 weeks just to be able to stand up long enough to wash the blood out of my hair. That’s how injured I was. Very injured.
When you are that hurt, your job is to heal. Sleep. Eat. Heal. It’s technically a wonder I could even keep showing up to teach my classes. But, I teach online. I could show up — and did.
Now, I’m working my ass off to take off the final pounds after that injury fiasco.
It’s not going all that well taking off pounds. If you’re building muscle replacing fat, weight doesn’t want to go down. Muscle weighs more than fat. For every fat pound you take off, you build up at least two new pounds in muscle. Or three. Or five. It’s MADDENING if you want to lose weight on the scale.
On the bright side, I’ve knocked two inches off my hips.
I know how this works. It’s not the first time I’ve rebuilt the body coming back from an injury. On the other hand?
It’s really time to stop getting injured.
July 26, 2016
Yoga Instructor: Your body will tell you what it needs.
Me: Beer. It’s definitely saying beer.
Yoga Instructor: Your body will tell you what it needs if your name is not Max.
July 24, 2016
A girl —
Standing in front of my balcony raises up her shirt to look at her stomach — a good bit above her stomach. When she drops her shirt she sees me.
“Sorry, I didn’t see you there.”
“I’ve got no beads, sorry.”
“Ain’t that always the way.”
Her dog turns ten tomorrow. I wished her dog happy birthday.
July 10, 2016
This is the funnest most bestest movie review ever. And totally the kind of movie review I would write if I could write movie reviews. Which I can’t because if you do that everyone in Hollywood gets mad and you can never work again. Probably even posting THIS movie review will get me black listed somewhere.
[Shut up, Hollywood. It is funny.]
I saw Tarzan and this is my review after some wines
~ by Emily from the blog EmilyWrites
So I had wine and I am very tired and so I am a bit tipsy but I saw the Tarzan movie so I thought I’d give my honest review.
Excuse typos because you know, wines.
Ok so I don’t know what the plot is or who is in it other than Alexander Skarsgard and Alexander Skarsgard’s magnificent holy abs. I don’t know what the dialogue or acting is like or whatever.
But like 1/3 of the way in Alexander Skarsgard is going to fight a gorilla for some reason and he takes off his shirt and OMG LIKE I ACTUALLY GROANED LOUDLY.
He does not put his shirt back on for the whole movie.
And like The V. sweet mother Mary the V I am telling you. The v is worth $15. The V is worth so much I wanted to see the movie again straight afterward.
Did I say that he doesn’t put his shirt back on?
July 2, 2016
This is cool. One of the photos from the photo shoot is up on the Last Satellite Instagram page. Yay!
*Hair & makeup by Kate Letherwood, photo by John Allen, Last Satellite Salon
June 10, 2016
So I spend all of this time beating up on my workshoppers saying, get a good photo. But I’ve been using a photo taken on a friend’s camera phone that’s over two years old a while now.
Clearly, if I want to set a good example, I had to go out and do new photos right?
[Right. God. Dammit.]
So I did. Yay!
Special thanks to Kate at Last Satellite for hair and makeup and to photographer John Allen for the shots.
June 5, 2016
Photographic evidence I wore makeup on Sunday, this day of our Lord on June 5th, 2016.
Also I wore a bra but you don’t get a shot of that. Pervos!
Now I have to dig my cape out of the laundry to save the space time continuum. Be back shortly. Smooch!
April 11, 2016
Friend: “I think your spirit animal might just be Harley Quinn.”