like!

September 6, 2014

 

like!

I posted on Facebook the other day that all my websites were crashed.

People came through and “liked” the post.

 


 

My websites are down, my servers are crashed, the school, my business, my book, everything, is offline crashed it could be the end of me.

People LIKED that.

 


 

There’s a weird autistic bordering on pathological [or maybe just pathological] mentality driving “likes.”

“Likes” mean “I was here” more than “I like this” or “I read this” or “I  saw you” or “I heard you.”

Just, “I was here.” Like initials carved in a school desk or graffiti on a bathroom stall wall. “I was here.”

 


What would happen if I posted that a parent or child died?

 


 

“I was here”?

 

 

Gotta Love the Oatmeal

August 4, 2014

todolist

Gotta love The Oatmeal.

Meanwhile, what should you be doing?

Checking out these bad ass posts. Doy.

–>South Park Writers Share Their Writing Rule #1

–>5 Instant Script Fixes

–>Authorial Intrusion is Your Friend

 


[you can even wear your underwear when you do it]

 

 

mad cap!

August 3, 2014

metal_horse

 

Yeah yeah yeah, maybe web design does not sound mad cap to you.

It is totally mad cap, but not in a good way.

Probably the stupidest term ever coined is “Web Master.”

“Webmaster” my ass, you Dungeons & Dragons freaks.  It is “Web Slave.”

Go see what I have been doing anyway: http://theafw.com/blog

jump the face

July 8, 2014

 

jtf_win_1

 

So. Having been in the FB experimental streams….

One stream was all dead or someone just died or someone has cancer all the time.

Another was, all dead maimed animals WITH PHOTOS all the time.

Me, I innocently thought I just had a really depressed whacked out group of friends and if I just kept slamming “I don’t want to see this” in the right places, it would all work out.

But, no.

It was Facebook Nazi experiments.

Yay!

[That yay is sarcasm.]

I’m on my way out.

I hope you will go with me.

:::JUMPTHEFACE:::

 

 

Screen shot 2014-07-03 at 5.26.26 AM

 

So Facebook keeps getting scummier and scummier, shifting privacy settings, manipulating newsfeeds, pushing weirder and weirder agendas. The latest is manipulating newsfeeds to see if lambasting people with depressing content will make people depressed.

Cripes. We so need a new social media site.

So.

I’m making my own.

I know, crazy, right?

Well maybe. Let’s find out.

Come visit:

:::AFWPUSHUP:::

 


*Note: The program I’m using to create that site — PushUp — is still pretty beta, it’s not mobile device friendly yet, you must verify your account using a desktop or laptop, phones and tablets will not work yet. Stress on the “yet.” Also soon to roll out: embedded vids and website links, yay!
 

Note II: I thought about walking you guys through it here. Then I thought, naw, why coddle them? Let’s go the Darwin route. If you run into trouble though, leave me a note here and we’ll sort things out. The program is pretty beta, there are still some rough spots.

 

 

 

wednesday kilt day

April 30, 2014

 

kilt_flash

Wednesdays are traditionally my day off.

You know what that means right?

New men in kilts photos yay!

 


:::men in kilts:::

 

 

kilt_pirate

I know, freaking gorgeous, right? Ahhh!

 


SO THERE I WAS completely minding my own business coming down off a 5 am work high trying to wear myself out enough to sleep —

[You don't know 5 am work highs?  They're what comes from pushing through midnight and 3 am and the desire to sleep and catching a second/third/fourth wind to keep working because you have something that needs to be finished before the alarm goes off for other people on some coast USA --- only then you are done and it is 5 am and you can't just go to sleep, you have defied the gods o' sleep too long and they are pissed so now you have to wind down and no, there are no drugs involved, quit it...]

— When this hot kilt meme showed up on FB and I thought, you know, maybe hot kilt guys would be just the thing right now and also everything else has a hot this or that page there should be a hot kilt page around here somewhere.

 


THERE WERE NO HOT KILT PAGES ON FACEBOOK.

Whut?

There was some private group.

[What the hell do they do in a private group?  Okay wait, that might be scary, don't answer that.]

There was an app. And it did not work.

Whut?

There was some page with like, 5 kilt photos.

Whut?

And no good hot kilt pages.

 


TRAVESTY!

So I made MEN IN KILTS.

 


ALSO HERE IS KIT HARRINGTON IN A KILT.

[You're welcome.]

kilt_kit_harrington

[I know.  It is not plaid.  Screw plaid!  It does not have to be plaid!  I am descended from Scots I can say that.  The real Scots might get a little excitable though.]

 


THAT IS THE STORY of how I came to be the mover and shaker behind the one and only acceptable hot guys in kilts page on FacebookMEN IN KILTS

I know, totally professional, right?

 


[Screw professional, life is short!  Okay maybe not so professional, but life IS short.  Also, we are talking kilts.  Yay!]

 


kilt_cat

 

 

et tu, pinterest?

March 16, 2014

 

This freaky image shows up in my Pinterest stream.

No I am not going to show you THAT fashion blunder it would defile the blog.

[Also it might make you blind.]

Here is a cute photo of a pony in boots instead.

pony mit shoes

 


 

Bad cheap pointy shoes with a bad cheap skirt made out of bad cheap fabric and the photo is taken at a bad cheap angle in bad cheap lighting.

Why the fuck is this image in my Pinterest stream?

And how do I kill it?

 


 

I hit the link.

Not following this board.

I hit the person.

Not following this person.

I’m confused. If I’m not following the board and not following the person WTF is this cheap ass gaudy image that might make me blind doing in my fucking Pinterest stream?

 


 

Pinterest has a new agenda. Pinterest is showing me this because Pinterest thinks I might be interested because of OTHER INTERESTS.

Jesus Christ, Pinterest, what are you now, Amazon? Facebook? Netflix? “Because you liked this other image, let’s show you one that will make you fucking blind you hate it so much”?

 


 

Here is a cute pony in boots again to make this less painful:

pony mit shoes

Dear Pinterest:

You’re Fired.

 

that internet thing

September 29, 2012

 

The thing about the internet is —

No link is ever dead. Ever. Someone somewhere or some search engine somewhere still remembers an url, a page, or a link and will bring up a link to a source that ceased to exist a bazillion years ago – always. It is kind of like the speed of light and stars thing, you can be looking at this star up in the heavens and see a star – only that star ceased to exist a century ago – you can just still see it because the light is still in transit even if the star is gone.

In internet terms, the link is still showing up and visible in a search even if the page went toes up years or weeks ago.

This is why I just spent the last week of my life 24/7 placing redirects on pages in the Max web empire. Because you cannot kill urls or web pages ever. They always, always, have to have a string of links or redirects that go somewhere that exists on the web.

There is an easier way to do it. Just tell the whole site to redirect. I could do that too if I were not using two separate servers to host two separate parts of AFW to insure, if one crashes?, there is emergency back up on the other. It is kind of more important to have a back up plan than an easy out. Oh well.

Hey come see the new book page. It is nifty.

 

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