madame slotsky is going to be pissed
May 5, 2013
I forgot how funny this is, it is from Raincoaster, circa August 12, 2007:
max adams: the Pinkertons dossier
As promised, here is max‘s biography. Consider biographization to be a meme if you enjoy such things.
Warning: your mileage may vary. We assume no liability. No warranty implied. Before beginning this or any exercise plan, consult your physician. Not intended as a replacement for the advice of a competent professional.
Which, if I’d had access to, would probably have resulted in something a lot less interesting.
max adams: the Pinkertons dossier
Editor’s note: In relating the circumstances which have led to my confinement within this refuge for the demented, I am aware that my present position will create a natural doubt of the authenticity of my narrative. It is an unfortunate fact that the bulk of humanity is too limited in its mental vision to weigh with patience and intelligence those isolated phenomena, seen and felt only by a psychologically sensitive few, which lie outside its common experience. Men of broader intellect know that there is no sharp distinction betwixt the real and the unreal; that all things appear as they do only be virtue of the delicate individual physical and mental media through which we are made conscious of them; but the prosaic materialism of the majority condemns as madness the flashes of supersight which penetrate the common veil of obvious empiricism.
max adams is such a phenomenon.
In creating this dossier we have been in constant contact with our offices in St. Petersburg, Istanbul, Silverlake, Ponape, Zurich, Area 51, Abu Simbel, Great Zimbabwe, and of course, Head-Smashed-In-Buffalo-Jump. Although facts are few, and expensively won, we have been able to assemble the following biographical sketch.
max adams is the laboratory-created daughter of the frozen sperm of Errol Flynn and pioneering biologist Nicolette Tesla (granddaughter of the famous physicist) who, deprived by the relentless progress of Glasnost of a ready supply of involuntary subjects, was forced to experiment upon herself.
Succeeding beyond her wildest dreams, she gave birth to max, whom she named Erriol in an epidural trance, during which she recited the entirety of The Tempest, with different voices and everything, pausing only to berate the attending doula for her hopelessly provincial dress sense.
max was raised in Tesla‘s mountain fortress to the age of four, when she was taken away by agents of the state to undertake the gruelling process of being schooled for the Olympic ice dancing team.
During a particularly contentious international competition in Bakersfield, California, max defected to the West and since that time has denied all knowledge of the former European Ice Dancing Championship team of Erriol Tesla and Sergey Brin.
She currently lives a quiet life as a night custodian and DJ at Slim Jim’s Crematorium and Rib House hidden deep in the bowels of the the new CAA headquarters, while maintaining a small scientific consulting practice with an exclusive clientele including MIT’s jet propulsion laboratory, Chicago’s Slam Poetry Championship, and Burger King.
~end~
Where that hilarity comes from: The Raincoaster, where else?
It is a bit in conflict with the Madame Slotsky biography but what can you do?
the new meme
February 26, 2013
Okay we are going crazy with a new meme. It is not my fault! My friend Tina started it by posting a really cool image and I said, Wow that is cool, and she said, Oh, it’s this site, Photo Funia, and bam, we were off and meme-ing. Yay!
There is an old meme, the meme we opened the book with, it was fun and there were prizes, check it out :::here:::
Want to play? Make a meme and post it on the book’s Facebook page. Memes are not quite as fun as Going Banksy, memes do not involve adrenalin and mildly illegal activities, but it’s still hella fun go for it: :::HIT THE FACEBOOK PAGE TO POST A MEME:::
birthday photos yay!
February 17, 2013
The birthday was major fun. Yay! Also I know you are crazy for photos so ooh la la birthday photos yay!
closed for max mas
February 10, 2013
*Blog closed for Max’s birthday, see you back here after Tuesday.
*Not doing invites this year, you know who you are, if you should be here, send email for times and locations.
the art of war
August 23, 2012
I’m having this conversation with some friends. They are making a movie.
My friends are also creating a comic book for the movie — or in more polite terms, a graphic novel — as a pre-launch ad campaign.
It’s a smart idea. Get it out there, get it circulating, get people knowing and talking and seeing and thinking about it. My friends figure they will break even on the comic too so it is free advertising hitting comic cons.
But they’re talking about this other guy. This guy who was pre-vamping for a film and made a comic book and never put the comic book on the market. He just printed up copies and gave them to studio suits and industry people, and never ever sold the comic. Sort of a fancier cooler kind of story board, that. And a collector’s item since there were only a very few in existence and you could only get them as a gift, they were not for sale. And my friends are saying this journalist one time hit him with this question, “You created the comic, you had it all graphed out and whatnot, printer friendly, ready for market” why didn’t you ever sell it?
And the filmmaker didn’t answer the question.
So we are sitting there. My friends are puzzling over why. And so am I. And then I know —
If he had put the comic book on the market, while he was selling the film? Industry people would have wanted to know the sales numbers and would have walked away if those weren’t high enough. So he made that book a gift, a special thing, that only some people could get, that wasn’t even available for sale. And he never had to answer the question “Is this a best seller?” in a meeting.
Smart guy.
where the art work comes from:
that is chess by nestor galina
