March 10, 2014
March 9, 2014
March 8, 2014
March 6, 2014
Word is [via Slate] Getty images just dropped the pay wall and is trying something new, embeds that link back to the original source. I see that news and think, cool, I can go link some of my Getty photos without the watermark. [See for even me to use Getty photos of me without the watermark, there was some sort of pay scheme going --- which seems wrong but there you have it.]
I do a search. They come up, but not on Getty. On Zimio. Whut?
Here’s a Getty photo from the 25th Nicholl Fellowships Awards ceremony. Look how spiff we all look yay!
[L-R: Rafael Arrieta, Donna McNeely, Michele Sutter, Max Adams and David Kurtz attend AMPAS' 25th Annual Don & Gee Nicholl Fellowships In Screenwriting Dinner at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel on November 4, 2010 in Beverly Hills, California.]
I love that photo but that’s not my favorite photo from that night. My favorite photo is not even a Getty photo it is an iPhone photo shot on the way to the awards when I hadn’t put my heels on yet and was stopping for a Diet Coke on the way. Yay!
[I had been off sugar, chocolate, sodas, coffee, bread and booze for two freaking weeks before the awards ceremony. Your face looks pretty for the camera if you knock all that crud off for a couple weeks --- but you are crying hard for a soda. Cry baby cry!]
March 4, 2014
I had paper dolls when I was a kid.
I spent a lot of time with my grandmother.
I was dressing the paper dolls in ski clothes one day.
[It's not my fault, some sort of Sochi winter Olympics shit was going down.]
My grandmother said, “Yeah it’s easy to dress them in ski clothes when you’re sitting under the air conditioning vent.”
Then she laughed.
I don’t think anyone else got my grandmother’s laugh.
[It was summer in California.]
[In a drought year.]
[And fucking hot.]
[If The Onion had been around then? My grandmother would have fucking owned it.]
My grandmother loved dogs.
I miss her.
March 2, 2014
In case you can’t read that — which some people can’t because of image clarity — I’m going to go all carpel tunnel on your ass and type it again:
QUESTION: “If you had a daughter and she was going to go out to a party with guys drinking would you let her go out looking like a slut?”
ANSWER: “If the next generation has sons that are as repulsed by rape as they should be then we won’t need to worry about our daughter’s clothing. Hell, if we just make our generation shift the blame from the victim to the perpetrator and recognize rape as an act of violence rather than a natural hazard then we won’t even notice clothing. In fact the only way that I’ll need to worry about my daughter’s clothing is if society stays this fucked. I’d probably end up doing something incredibly violent to somebody if anything ever happened to one of my loved ones and the system failed them.
“So the question becomes: If you had a son and he was going out to a party with girls drinking, would you let him go knowing that one of them could be my daughter and that if he ever touched her without her consent I’d kill you?
“You focus on raising a son that you can confidently send to a party even if you think that you will die if he inappropriately touches a woman and I’ll focus on raising a daughter full stop.”
*I believe the original source for that is a Tumblr blog, Marxisforbros, btw, if you want to check that out. And if I’m wrong someone tell me so I can correct that.
There are a lot of responses and comments below the post on the Women’s Rights News post. They range from “I can dress however I want!” to “Fucking feminzi scum!” [That's not my typo, I can spell Feminazi.]
Here’s the thing.
In some cultures, any female not wearing a burka is “dressed like a slut.” Shall our daughters wear burkas so as not to inflame rapists? Is that what we should teach them? Or should we teach our sons not to rape?
I’m going with teach our sons not to be monsters and rapists. Mileage may vary. Here’s a burka:
And here’s a clip of a woman dressed in Western European clothing told she’s naked and trying to seduce people and should go home and put on some clothes [that starts at 146 on the clip if you want to skip ahead, they tell her she's going to Hell too].
So back to THE THING.
EVERYONE in this conversation believes he or she knows what “dressing like a slut” means.
Bad news though.
What you think “dressing like a slut” means?
May be very very different from the boy who thinks your daughter is a rape toy because his and his parents’ idea of what “dressing like a slut” means is, well, not wearing a burka.
PS: All of this may be very new or confusing for some people so just in case you are a criminally insane bad parent or were raised wrong and so are a criminally insane rapist, here are some helpful tips on :::HOW NOT TO BE A RAPIST:::
February 27, 2014
February 27, 2014
Showed up on Jezebel the other day, all about women needing stronger [or at least with better dialogue] roles in Hollywood. [I'll give you the link later, hang in there.] It features a youtube clip of actress and producer Olivia Wilde.
[From House, you punks, start reading the fucking credits.]
It’s titled “Olivia Wilde Crushes It When She Talks About Women in Hollywood.”
Olivia Wilde totally does crush it too. [I'll give you that link too if you stick around.]
[Stop scrolling, you attention deficit bastards, there is method to my madness.]
The problem is the Jezebel writer, Hillary Crosley, doesn’t “crush it.”
[Sorry, Hillary, I'm sure you're a lovely person.]
Here is how Hillary’s “go girls” article ends:
“First you get the producers, then you get the power, then you get the women.”
Cute. But. No. Though it is a darling twist on the protest quote “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.”
That is Gandhi right?
Hollywood is not Occupy Wall Street. Hollywood is a corporate living breathing high school metaphor — that is supposed to make a profit, not topple banking corruption or withstand pepper spray in New York parks. And the emphasis there though it should maybe be on “high school” is on “make a profit.” As in “huge fucking profit.” And if you don’t get that? You don’t get Hollywood.
In Hollywood, producers don’t bring in the money – or the power.
Producers in Hollywood are matchmakers. They match talent [actors, actresses, directors, writers] with projects [books, adaptations, concepts, specs] and studios [studios are the purse that is highly corporate and also linked into more corporate deals like “distribution” which is often with other studios and often highly problematic and is also another subject entirely that would take a whole other post so moving on].
Or, using another metaphor, let’s pretend we’re planning a home coming dance.
Yay! Back to high school!
Producers are the party planners. Producers bring everyone together, but producers in Hollywood aren’t paying for the dance or directing the dance. They are just matching all the right players up so it sounds like a really fun party and everyone goes, “Hey, great party, fuck, everyone will come, let’s do it!” Then the studios supply the cash and you know, if you’re bankrolling the party, that gives you some say. But if you throw [bankroll] a party and no one comes to the party [no cover charges, no drink sales, ahhh!]? Like, the homecoming queen and king say, Fuck you, dead party, we’re going to the country club instead?
Dead in the water.
So that’s why the [prom queen] talent can have more clout than the studio [bank roll]. The talent [prom queen] is the core of the equation. Because if the prom queen boycotts your party?
No fucking party.
Did the metaphor work?
So the power, making Hollywood films? Resides with studios [the money], and with talent [the people the studios will throw money into a project with because if those people boycott future parties?, no more parties].
So how does this all boil down in terms of hot female lead and hot dialogue for female characters projects in Hollywood?
You don’t go to the producer. You go to the toughest female Hollywood talent on the block, with or without tats, they have served their time and fought their way up through the hierarchy and have the clout.
This does not mean producers are not important. Producers are crazy important. Mostly the party would not even happen without producers. But do you know who Gale Anne Hurd is? [God I hope so but doubt it. Go IMDB you fools. Ahhh!] How about Robert Evans? [No? Ahhh!]
In other words, Miss Crosley? You got it wrong.
You want to make hot female driven projects? You do not start with “the producers.” You start with the toughest women in Hollywood.
And when I say “tough,” I don’t mean prison tats. I mean, they are the prom queens of Hollywood. They have such powerful track records with the studios, have starred in so many films that made the studios so much money, if they say, I want to make this or star in this or produce this or direct this? The studio suits will say, “I can’t risk you not showing up at my next party, I will write this check.”
There is a caveat.
[There always fucking is a caveat. This is Hollywood. Bummer.]
“If this party fails, you go to Tough Hollywood Babe With Clout Jail” and stop making me fund parties no one shows up to.”
That means the tough girls in Hollywood have something to lose every single time they back something. See, if the suits get really pissed? They could screw up that other thing we don’t have time to talk about — distribution. And something we haven’t even mentioned here — promotion. And to cannon ball past all that? That’s a lot of effort. And why would they do that for another woman instead of for themselves making profit off a film that is important to them, stars them, and will keep them and their film career alive another decade or more?
And that’s another subject that would make this post too long. So. Let’s go back to the original point.
You want more women dominated films in Hollywood? You want better roles for women in film? You want better dialogue for women in films? You don’t talk to the party planner [producers]. You talk to the prom queens [tough ass kicker women actors and directors and writers in Hollywood -- and the big prom queens are the actresses, you can't fire them halfway through principal photography without dropping millions, everyone else is fungible].
Wait, I promised you the Olivia Wilde clip too. Here you go yay!:
Also, I should link you to the Jezebel piece. Sigh:
PS: Dear Jezebel Peeps: If you need someone who actually understands Hollywood on the payroll? Hit my link. If I’m too busy or expensive? I’ll refer you.
February 25, 2014
*For all my students who come out of :::classes:::
looking at old scripts with new eyes.
February 25, 2014
Apparently I have upset a bunch of “nice guys” by re-posting the David Wong essay and now they are gathered on another board dedicated to “no hate talk” calling me ignorant and stupid, among other things. Fun!
As long as people are all riled up though, here is Louis CK’s observations on women dating. [Louis CK is way more fun than a bunch of self proclaimed "nice guys" I don't know calling me an ignorant slut.]